Some Whacky Definitions !!!

Humour 2946 views 15 replies

School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

 

 

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.


Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.


Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

 

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"



Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.


Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.


Father: A banker provided by nature.


Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.


Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.


Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.


Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.


Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.


Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.


Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.


Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.


Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.


Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.


Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.


Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death

 


 

Replies (15)

Worlds smallest resignation letter 

 

 

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Dear Sir,


I Love Your Wife.

 ~~~~~~~~~~

IT Heights...


HEIGHT OF ISOLATION:
Two persons sitting side by side using emails to communicate with each other.


HEIGHT OF COWARDICE:
Two persons fighting through emails.


HEIGHT OF HELPLESSNESS:

 

Receiving no emails for a week.


HEIGHT OF FRUSTRATION:
The email server being down.


HEIGHT OF CARELESSNESS:
Writing a love mail and doing a 'Send All.'


HEIGHT OF TIMEPASS:
A person sending email to himself


HEIGHT OF EXPECTATION:
Sending Indian cricket team an e-mail, wishing them to win a match


HEIGHT OF REPETITION:
Forwarding an email to someone and receiving the same email forwarded back to you By some one in the receiving chain.


HEIGHT OF BROWSING:
U r swimming in the water tank and shout 'F1 F1 F1 ' instead of shouting 'HELP' when u are unable to swim...

Really fantastic sir.....

I really cant think such kind of humours..

Heads off......

Really Thanks

Thanks Tejun for noticing the post !!!

Gud1 sir.....

Nice.....

One more beautiful delivery from ankur ji...

Thanks for the post.!!

Nice one also posted here

/forum/very-funny-definition--101858.asp 

Really very nice sir.

Thanks members for comments


Sorry guys for repeating the post as i was not aware about the existence of this post. Ya others forum ka chakkar hi bakar hai...


Thanks Aditya Ji for the link.

Dear Ankur Ji.....
I know it was unintentional. But it caught eye of many members who did not see my post earlier. So ultimately it brought smile to the faces of many others who could not see my post. Ultimately the knowledge ( Happiness in this case) should spread. And that's what u did. Nothing wrong in it.  These things will happen. It is not possible to check every post before posting in forum.
Regards.
CMA. Sanjay Gupta

Originally posted by : geetha

Really very nice sir.

Awesome ,Fabulous, Oustanding Post Sir...

Keep Sharing Such Posts...

sir, those were the wittiest definitions i've ever learnt!!! i wish such  definitions also find place iin our laws.. would've been easy to learn!!!! JUST KIDDING!

nice sharing


CCI Pro

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