Dear All Professional Collogue,
I need an advice for my person life. I know I should have not chosen this platform to ask for an advice but I believe only here I can get some genuine advice which I need the most at this junction of my life.
First of all let me introduce myself as a person. I am a simple man from a Marwari higher middle class family. I was the first person who had become CA in our entire community. My dad had spent his entire life in business and having a very good reputation in the society. To be more precise about me, I was a shy kind of student in my school and college days. I had done my schooling from a municipal Hindi school because at that time we were facing financial problems. I was not good at sport so thought why not excel in studies so started concentrating hard on my studies.
I have completed my CA in 2007 (Nov 2006) from Mumbai. After two years of Industrial exposure I thought I should start my own firm. My family never encouraged me for starting the practice because I was getting very good salary from the Industry. But I had joined this CA course with a dream that one day I WILL BE A SUCCESSFUL PRACTICING CA. So I thought to start I should take decision before it’s too late. So had applied for COP started looking for retainers ship in any private ltd company. With the gods grace I got the professional assignment on retainership basis in a construction company.
Then at the age of 28 in year 2010 my family told me to get married with any girl from our cast. So on every weekend I was meeting girls which my parents had approached. I almost met 24 girls but I couldn’t convince myself to select one from them. Actually I was looking for an educated girl who can understand me but my family was looking for an uneducated girl who can do work at home, follow the tradition (Gunghat pratha & all) which I really don’t like. Then I finally met a girl from Pune, we had a meeting at her home. We liked each other at first meeting and exchanged numbers. She was a commerce graduate but sitting at home for last two year because her parents were against her higher education which she wanted to do. She told me I want to do MBA will you allow me to do so? I said why not. Then I depicted the entire situation to my parents that I like this girl but she wants to study further for two years MBA (Finance) before marriage. My parents didn’t like that and told me to forget that girl and look for other option. My parents had told NO to their family with a reason that… “aapki ladki to 2 saal padhna chahti hai” I was disappointed….. Then I had called that girl on her cell number and decided to meet her…….We met several time and started loving each other…….we got engaged against the wish of our family. I really wanted that she should do her further studies so we forced our family to agree on our relation on a condition that no one will object on her education. We got married in the month of May 2011 but both the families were not happy. Mean while she started her MBA and secured good marks in her exams.
We both love each other & understand each other but our families are not happy. Especially my family they want “ki ghar ki bahu ghar se bahar nahi jani chahiye”. We want to start new life but now my family doesn’t allow me to do what I want.
My brother is also doing CA and my dad want that we should work in a same firm though after marriage his wife and my wife are enemy of each other. They don’t like to see each others face.My brother also hate my wife and sometimes uses abusive language for her.
My dad has given me an office in a Non-metro city near to Mumbai and told that you will get the support of our community and will get the professional assignment. I started work and got decent work and I think I can get establish myself in the coming time. I want my life where no one interferes in some one’s life. My family doesn’t want to get separated and have my personal & professional life. They don’t like my wife and want to create misunderstanding between us. I don’t want to lose her as well and at the same time don’t want to run away from my responsibilities.
My family wants only money from me. They are not concerned about my happiness in my life with my wife. My dad continuously threatens me to give no share from his properties to me. I don’t understand what to do. My dad believes in joint family and I don’t want the complicated joint family where no one likes each other. I want a peaceful life what should I do in this situation…. Beacause of this tention I am not able to concentrate on my work and getting depressed day by day…….
Should I go in other city and start my work?? But in that case what would happen to my existing office and my clients??
Or should I get a separate home on rent & operate from my existing office????? In that case my family will definitely interfere that why your wife is working in office with me…Log kya kahenge and all there dialog????
Or should I surrender my COP & do job and give money to my parents and live my life separately????But in that case will I be able to come again in Practice ever???
Or should I commit suicide????? But I don’t want to waste my efforts which I have done to gain the prestigious degree of CA…….
I am not able to take firm decision because of emotions attached to everyone……I am a CA with DISA qualification but not able to solve this problem…….???????? I am one of the top members of CA Clubindia so I am sure someone will give me an advice which will give new direction to my life. Please readers do help me ………
CAclubindia
