8th March - The International Women's Day!!
The Day when every woman's Whatsapp is flooded with the wishes!! So much respect, care, concern, celebrations, gifts, tribute, salutes and blah blah blah just for a day. So many generalized statements are made- Each day is a women's day!, Who says this is a male-dominated society, rather its a female dominated society?We live in a gender equal society!, Boys and girls are same!, Whether its a boy or a girl, both are same for parents! etc. But its high time that this society understands and accepts the reality!!
Even if I agree for a second that both men and women are equal, then why there has to be a day when women are treated as special? Because everyone there knows that they're not treated with equality on the other days, so compensate it on a single day called "Women's Day".
This is the day when suddenly everyone starts realizing the importance of motherhood & sisterhood. What about the other days? I need not mention the stupid terms like B.C., M.C., etc. Now even jokes are incomplete if they don't start with these terms.
This is the day when we treat our female colleagues, female friends, girlfriends so respectfully. What about rest of the days in a year? "Item, Machine, Maal", etc.
This is the day when we start respecting the mother's womb, realizing her sacrifices for a period of nine months and so on. But has anyone till date questioned in school or afterwards that why mother's name was not included in the form or why more than 95% of the population uses only father's name as the middle name? Now i have heard a few examples like Sanjay Leela Bhansali but again I am talking on a macro level.
There's no difference between a boy and a girl!! Is it so? Then why can't we see girls roaming freely on the roads during midnight as the boys are found with their gang? Why a girl has to be a bit conscious about the time when she's out of house? You can't be very late at office, parties, functions, etc. Why there has to be a male to protect her, to drop her or take her home? I mean if there's everything so green for girls, then why such things are observed?
Boys and girls are same!? Really? Then why we need to promote girls education? Why do we need "beti bachao, beti padhao" kind of andolans? Agreed that India has witnessed an era where women were not treated well. But now to say, we live in a gender equal society. So why not treat both at par? Why there needs to be free education for girls, no exam fees for candidates? The problem lies in the root of everyone's thinking and mentality.
Because as soon as a girl is born, the stupid past mentality crops up even in the minds of learned and educated people. First of all age old terms like 'paraya dhan', 'dusro ki amanat', shadi karke kisi aur ke ghar jayegi, jyada padh likhke karegi kya? I know majority of population won't agree to this but I have analyzed everything in depth.
Even if a girl is born and family is happy, still they need a male child to take forward their generations or surname whatever.
Nowadays girls are studying, comparatively performing better than boys, getting educated but what next? If a boy goes for higher education, it’s a moment of proud, but if a girl wishes to do so, a very nice explanation is provided that "Who said you to stop studying, you can continue it even after marriage". Why is a girl not compelled to complete her studies? Why is she not given equal responsibility as a son is given? Why need she not earn for her family, buy a house, buy a car, etc.?
I have seen hundreds of girls while pursuing my studies who give up on their career for the sake of marriage and their families expectations. Why can't the parents of this country provide their daughters those extra 2-3 years for making their career before marriage?
No father or mother would ever tell their female child to shoulder their responsibilities after getting educated, they will expect this only from their son. And the only expectation with a daughter is getting happily married and serve the other family, that's your responsibility. We can't expect anything from her because she was born for others and not for us.
And the biggest oldest tradition you have to leave your house after marriage. Very well explained on questioning, "this is custom or tradition which is going on for years together and will continue to be". But why? Is it necessary to continue following those selfish customs? When will everyone in this society start understanding, realizing and accepting that even a girl has a heart, her feelings, a suppressed voice which screams silently for her rights? Even her parents turn old, they also need attention and care, they also need a family with whom they can spend their old age. Is giving birth to a girl child 'sin'? If not, then why such situations are created when it is felt so? Why is a girl forced to make sacrifices under the name of tradition? Why her parents stay alone for rest of their life?
A husband can't stay at wife's house, otherwise, he'll be labeled as "ghar jamayi". Unfortunately, no such concept exists for girls. If a boy is called ghar jamayi, it hurts his self-respect and girls don't carry self-respect. They are anyway shameless, they can stay at others' house. They don't have any identity till marriage (not even their permanent full name), they start earning respect, recognition, jobs only after marriage. Even if they have everything, they need to change because a boy can't leave his family, settled business or job, it's highly impossible!Its only possible for females.
A boy need not change his surname, identity, job, location, appearance or anything but a girl needs to do everything because again its 'tradition'. Because if you'll not do the above things, how come people will come to know that you're married. Males can remain as they were before marriage, they don't need any symbol to show that they're married. They can always roam as single and flirt with anyone. They're not meant for sacrifices or changes, you are made for that.
Anti-dowry things talked about is only a thing on paper, The reality check is a new term used or replaced for dowry is "GIFTS". Dowry doesn't exist, people from good families don’t expect dowries, they expect expensive gifts and a splendid marriage. No matter if the entire savings of a girl's parents is spent on that marriage. No matter if they have not saved enough for their retirement or have borrowed debts but the marriage should be impressive. And this stupid custom is another burden on every female's parents till she gets married.
This difference in treatment, approach and thoughts for women in the country is gender discrimination. Till the time, these things are not abolished in the system, there can be no gender equality which we claim. If you can't let women decide what they want in their life, so gender equality is far away, girls are not even provided independence.After analyzing the present scenario of the society, I don't know how this is called a female dominated society? Unaccepted, but this is still very much a male-dominated society.
The girls who claim to have most understanding, loving, caring life partner, family, in-laws, etc.Get a reality check for yourself just by asking your beloved partner if he and his family will be able to do the things which you do for them. Yes, I know, love is not conditional but let it not be blind. If you love so selflessly, think of your parents too who raised you, loved you, cared for you, supported you and so much more. Leaving everything for a person you get married to or for that matter, you fell in love with is not totally justified. Don't be so overburdened with the expectations of society under the name of tradition, that you can't stand for yourself. If a woman can do so much for everyone, she need not be controlled but supported.
These things can be changed only when women start believing that this can change. It's not going against the society, but demanding your very own rights as an individual. If a woman can't stand for herself, nobody ever will do it for her. Stop sacrificing by convincing yourself with some stupid reasons and solutions. The day when women join together for CHANGING THE TREND is the day when we'll not require such women's day. I came across a beautiful message today, " Some fights are not worth your time. Choose what you fight for wisely." The day you give up on small fights is the day you start becoming successful. So, stop fighting with the people who gossip about you, stop fighting with your family and in-laws, stop fighting with people who oppose you, stop fighting for attention but don't give up on fighting for your own rights, right thoughts and dreams.