Hey guys, thanks for tuning in to this article, this is a conversation I had with one of the readers here. Convinced about its relevance to all of you, I am sharing excerpts of it. Please do not be mad at me if I am not able to respond to your personal messages. I have my exams too, right!!?
So here is how it went:
Reader: Please help my name is xyz. I am writing to you after reading your recent article. I am facing the same problem that you were probably facing. I have been an average student scoring 85% and 75% in 10th and 12th. Thereafter I cleared CPT with 56% and then I lost focus in studies and my cycle started in IPCC only. It has been 6 attempts now...m scoring less not because am not that intelligent but coz m unable to face studies and procrastination. This time also I filled form for November and till now m unable to study properly. I don't want to leave CA. I want to become one. I am too low in confidence now. Please help me. Your reply may be enough.
My thoughts: Reaching out for help after assessing your situation is the first and the most important step, because think about it, if you would have been capable to find a solution in your current state of situation. You would already have. Reach out to people, Ask questions, Be straightforward. Be stubborn when it comes to having your doubts and concepts clear. If you think, your doubts are not important, Oh my! They are what forms your fundamental self. Don't hesitate. Even if you take the worst scenario approach, the other person will ignore you. What else can they possibly do?
But remember one thing, your doubts are your responsibility. DO NOT shift that responsibility to anyone. You are going to postpone and waste your time and precious energy doing that., with no solution at the end.
Sometimes, in fact many times. I get my doubts clarified, while reading a book. Or while watching a TV series.
Start keeping a physical diary for a list of your doubts. Give them the kind of importance they deserve.
Mansi: Today is 13th Sept. We have a month and a few days in hand for our attempt, correct? I am sure you have your books and relevant classes completed. So everything else is done, except for self-study part of it. You have failed a number of times, not being confident is natural. It would have been absurd if you were, lol. Can we conclude that whatever is happening to you right now is not in your control? And it's all situation led?
Like, for eg: if you would have passed, you would have been more confident. So your confidence depends on the external responses and situations of people around you. Think about it..do you think it is ok to give so much of your self control and power away to things that you dont even have control on? I dont think its ok. Once you are convinced it needs to change and that there is a problem here. We will talk about what needs to be done to bring that change. Think about it and let me know..
Reader: Yes, I agree with you. I have been led by external situations. When my parents have a fight or an argument, even that disturbs me to my core. I have started taking everything so personally that even my friends are afraid to say anything that I might react to and get mad at them.
Mansi: Alright, we are on the same page then.
My suggestion for you would be to bring some discipline in your life. It does not mean making plans and killing yourself over being perfect to the minute.
I mean, start with small things, wake up, make your bed, lock your phone in some drawer for the rest of the day, give the keys away to your mother so you do not have any access to it.( this is considering your exams are your priority at the moment), make a to-do list for the day, include your studies and other chores that are needed to be done by you in that list.
Stretch your body out, feel the heartbeat and pump blood into your system.
Do some physical exercise, yoga, breathing exercise. Time it. Not more than 45 min should be spent on this activity. Be aware of your conversations. Every word that drops out of your mouth is PRECIOUS. It is a combination of your thoughts, your energy.
Every conversation you have with your friends/ parents. Watch your tone, your words. Be nice consciously.
Take charge of every small act that you are doing in your day.
It will seem like a very difficult task initially, because you haven't realized your power till date.
Power is control. It will make you unstoppable.
But you need to work on it, build it each moment, each day. It will not happen overnight.
Don't assign any task to yourself that starts feeling cumbersome.
For example: Mansi said, keep a diary. I will visit a stationery shop today and buy a diary specifically because SHE said and I want to improve. Ok, great, you get a diary, you write in your best handwriting in the first 2 pages for 2 days and the third day you are back to being how you were initially.
And the diary just becomes another book in your rough notebooks.
To get consistency, you need to convince yourself after giving it a lot of thought and time considering all the pros and cons of the situation.
Once this analysis is done, and you start any activity. Damn yeah! You will DO it!!
Don't give yourself so less importance, I mean come on. If you really start to think, being born as a human is a privilege in itself. You have the power to control your breathe, your mind. But we so comfortably give it away to things, situations, people. Its unfair to yourself.
Please take conscious efforts and give YOURSELF time. Observe what is wrong in your way of living. Change it. One change in one area of your physical being brings about big psychological changes that you aren't even aware of right now.
START EXERCISING. To reap the full benefits of your mental powers. You need to keep your body in good health.
And I repeat, all this will not happen in a day. That is where I demand PATIENCE from you.
Happiness will be a by-product of all these activities. DO THESE THINGS, YOU WILL BE HAPPIER and much more in CONTROL.
Happy studying guys!!
It's a hectic time if you are unable to focus, it is not the fault of the TV sound that is so high, not the sound of your mother talking loudly over call. It is you. Work on your physical self to get the benefits of your mental self. It is very simple.
An application requires dedication. But the results are definite. Take it from me!
See ya :)