A Satirical Take on Life of a Big4 Article

I have learnt more about punctuation doing Call and Compare or CC as its lovingly called than I Have learnt in school.

My suggestions are always valued. When I say I don’t want to go to any outstation audit. I immediately get sent to one. When I say I want a small client I immediately get a big MNC client to audit.

Urban Dictionary defines Articles as “the Greek god who protects all paper and printed documents stored within the Clouds around Mount Olympus” No wonder I spend most of time taking print-outs and scanning documents.

In my three years of internship I have made some very valuable friends. One of them is “the laptop” which is with me through thick and thin, come rain or terrible heat, no matter how the long journey is to client’s place. No wonder that after a few months I end up suffering from back ache... “ahhh..well, the things people endure for their friends”

I don’t mind working on weekends for an hour or two provided I get a whole day comp-off in return. “Kuch paane ke liye Kuch khona padtha hai”

Just as in the Corporate world a Company Secretary is the Link between the shareholders and the company, In the audit world I am the link between the client and audit team. The client bitches tom me about how unrealistic the audit team demands are and the team bitches about how uncooperative the client is.

Within days of starting my internship I was equipped with tools which would ensure my success in this field. The tools being “Ctrl+C” Ctrl+V” Alt+Tab”

I don’t know when or who invented the calculator but god bless him/her for the invention that helps me survive tracing.

My main goal in life during the three years of internship is to get my expense reports signed which sometimes may be inflated; adhering to the old adage “Aim Higher in case you fall short”.

I consider it my duty to remind members of my audit team to have lunch, order for snacks and try to enjoy their life in general lest audit consume their life.

Along with doing audit many-a-times I end up having to play the role of a tutor .i.e. teaching excel shortcuts to the client and then watch as they keep forgetting to use it….*new found respect for my school and college teachers*.

My work efficiency is most often than not measured by what I actually do but by how late I sit every day and how well presented my work papers are irrespective of whether they have any observations or not..

I have recurring nightmares where my hard earned comp-offs get rejected based on the “actual productive working hours” principle.

I AM JUST AN ARTICLE.

(The above is just a satirical take on life of a big4 article and everything written is to be taken in jest)