On his way to office one day, Vicky saw a man driving a Merc behind him. But why was the man honking furiously? There was absolutely no space for Vicky to give way to the man, and so he ignored him. After about two minutes, Vicky casually glanced at the man, who, by now, had managed to find space to drive past. The Merc driver rolled down his window and angrily asked Vicky why he was glaring at him. “That’s a nice shirt you’re wearing,” responded Vicky, showing him the thumbs up sign as he drove past. Caught on the wrong foot, the Merc guy had fallen silent. A fortnight later, when the same Merc man spotted Vicky on the road, he grinned and waved to him.
Here’s another scenario: One evening, Mukul was roughed up by two men on a bike. Mukul’s fault – he had to slam the breaks to avoid hitting a motorist who was veering towards his car. The bikers, who were too close behind, almost fell down while trying to avoid hitting Mukul’s car. When he tried to tell them that they should maintain a safe distance while driving, the duo turned abusive.
I have heard that in Japan, when two vehicles collide, the respective drivers step out, exchange cards politely, and go their way. No shouting, no fisticuffs. The insurance companies take it on from there and arrange for compensation for any damage. Perhaps because of their inclination for introspection, and their tradition of being polite and courteous in public exchanges, we don’t hear of unruly driving in Japan.
Chaos on the roads, lack of respect for traffic rules, aggressive driving and worst of all, road rage, have become the norm in Indian cities, Not everyone who drives on city roads make the effort to diffuse tension like Vicky did – when it is not so difficult to do so. Because road rage has even led to murder, it is dangerous even for passers-by to try and mediate between the warring parties.
Why do we blow our top so frequently, especially on the road and during traffic jams? Although we can point to various reasons like poor infrastructure, bad driving, getting late for appointments and the weather, all leading to stress, the real reason is more deep-rooted. Why do we find it so difficult to be calm and compassionate? Where is the “Pehle aap”(you first) etiquette? The major ‘speedbreaker’ here is your ego.
Former police commissioner Maxwell Pereira says road rage usually strikes people with ego problems. Anger levels keep rising over each irrational act of the other road user -- not necessarily a vehicle driver, but even a pedestrian, cyclist, bullock- cart, camel or elephant compete for your attention, he says. “Every time an anger-prone person sits behind the wheel, it is a race against the rest of the world. And when he feels that the other road user is getting the better of him, the pressure builds up in him to overtake him and bingo; you could have an accident, because all the ingredients come together and create an untoward incident,” says Pereira
Mitali Mukherjee, a Pune-based psychology teacher says, “Aggressive driving is usually rooted in a feeling of powerlessness and helplessness; hence one could easily get hurt. By responding aggressively to the behaviour of others, the victim turns villain.”
“The best way to deal with aggressive drivers is to keep your cool — and your distance. If you make a mistake in traffic, forgot your blinker or are driving too slowly, and someone uses that as a stimulus to become aggressive, it’s really important not to feed into that,” says Bhupendra Singh, who works with an MNC in Mathura Road and who has to plough through thick traffic every day.
Ego is often directly related to the size of your vehicle. The bigger your vehicle, the bigger will be your ego. The car or bus becomes an extension of our ego-laden self. It obeys us instantly. As soon as we slide behind the steering wheel, we use the vehicle as a way to exercise control and experience a sense of achievement. I have often heard bus drivers shouting expletives at small cars for daring to overtake them. “Oye machchar. Kuchal doonga” (Hey you mosquito, I’ll squash you) or “Mere se panga leta hai, sabun dani” (Don’t mess with me, you soap box!)) are a common refrain.
The Transport and Travel Wing, a service wing of Rajayoga Education and Research Foundation -- a sister concern of the Brahmakumaris -- has launched a project, ‘Safety through spiritual life-skills,’ to promote the importance of peace of mind, inner stability and values for enhancing safety on the road. Project coordinator BK Kavita says “Stress, impatience and ego are one of the many factors that trigger road rage. Participants are helped to understand and touch the peace-loving, honest human spirit within that inspires them to act with responsibility.
Yogacharya Suraksh*t Goswami offers a simple solution to reduce stress level on the road. “Use the time you spend waiting for the signal to change green to connect with yourself.” “Instead of cursing the jam, think these few minutes are godsent and are exclusively yours. Close your eyes and feel your breath. If you have to wait longer, do Bhambri Pranayam. Or you can chant Aum. These techniques help you to stay calm.” Goswami’s advice to people is to rush through your work at home and start early. If you leave your house in a relaxed state of mind, you will drive without getting irritated, he says.
CAclubindia
