Jokes

 Kids in school think quick   

TEACHER    :    Maria, go to the map and find North America . 

MARIA         :    Here it is! 

TEACHER    :    Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? 

CLASS          :    Maria! 

____________________ 

TEACHER     :    Why are you late, Frank? 

FRANK          :    Because of the sign. 

TEACHER     :    What sign?

FRANK          :    The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow." 

___________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER:   John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? 

JOHN       :   You told me to do it without using tables! 

___________________________________________________________ 



TEACHER    :   Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?" 

GLENN         :    K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" 

TEACHER    :    No, that's wrong 

GLENN         :    Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

___________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER    :    Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? 

DONALD      :    H I J K L M N O!!

TEACHER    :    What are you talking about?

DONALD      :    Yesterday you said it's H to O!

___________________________________________________________ 



TEACHER      : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we 

Didn't  have ten years ago. 

WINNIE        :    Me!

___________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER    :    Goss, why do you always get so dirty?

GOSS          :    Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.



___________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER    :    Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."

MILLIE    :    I is...

TEACHER    :    No, Millie..... Always say, "I am." 

MILLIE     :    All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

___________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER    :    Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?

TINO: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time." 

___________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry 

Tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father

            Didn't punish  him?" 

LOUIS    : Because George still had the ax in his hand.

___________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER      :  Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? 

SIMON          :    No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

___________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER      :   Clyde , your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as 

Your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE           :    No, teacher, it's the same dog!;

__________________________________________________________ 

TEACHER : Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? 

HAROLD   :    ( A teacher )