Mind Blowing Interview Jokes Ever....

Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.



Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.



Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!



Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it .

What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly! in 12th.I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said  - "I can not invest so much of money".(The father actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly

speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.



Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.



Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I BUNKED in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.



Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.



Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had PHOBIA in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.



Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.



Candidate: No, no... I am talking about Exams!!



Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?



Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when i BUNKED in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra ) through some relative.



Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?



Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!!



Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?



Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai)





Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?



Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!



Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?



Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.





Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?



Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows.



Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?



Candidate: No, but I gues! s it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like - 'Showstoppers ' , 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM','quality','versioncontrol','deadlines' , 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my

mistakes!



Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?



Candidate: Not much.

1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.

2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.

3. I believe in flexi-timings.

4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.

5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest Wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.

6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe . As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?



Interviewer: he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. ...