Men will be men

What He Says - What He Means

• "I'm going fishing."
  Really means: "I'm going to stand by a stream with a stick in my hand all day, while the fish swim by in complete safety." 
   
• "It's a guy thing."
  Really means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical." 
   
• "Can I help with dinner?"
  Really means: "Why isn't it already on the table?" 
   
• "Uh-huh." "Sure, honey." "Yes, dear."
  Really means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response. 
   
• "It would take too long to explain."
  Really means: "I have no idea how it works." 
   
• "We're going to be late."
  Really means: "Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac." 
   
• "Take a break, honey, you're working too hard."
  Really means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner." 
   
• "That's interesting, dear."
  Really means: "Are you still talking?" 
   
• "Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing."
  Really means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon." 
   
• "I can't find it."
  Really means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless." 
   
• "You know I could never love anyone else."
  Really means: "I am used to the way you yell at me and realize it could be worse." 
   
• "You look terrific."
  Really means: "Please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving." 
   
• "I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are."
  Really means: "No one will ever see us alive again."