Funny Email

Shailesh (accounts & Excel VBA) (342 Points)

16 August 2009  

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Dear Tech Support

Last year I upgraded from 
Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 . 

In addition, 
Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as 

        Romance 9.5 and 

        Personal Attention 6.5, 

and then installed undesirable programs ,
 such as 

        NBA 5.0, 

        NFL 3.0   and 

        MLB 4.1 

Conversation 8.0 
no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2. simply crashes the system. 

        Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. 

What can I do? 




First, keep in mind, 

        Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while  

        Husband 1.0 is an operating system. 

Please enter command: 
ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. 

        If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. 

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause 
Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5 , Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1 

        Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta. 

Whatever you do, 
D0 NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.) 

In addition, please do not attempt to re 
install the Boyfriend 5.0 program.   These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 . 

In summary, 
Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend 

        Cooking 3.0 and 

        Hot Lingerie 7.7. 

Good Luck Desperate