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Crises Jokes !!!>>> Interesting !!

CA CS CIMA Prakash Somani (Landmark Group) (23512 Points)

17 October 2008

1. The problem with investment bank balance sheets is that, 'On the left side nothing is right and on the right side nothing is left'.

2. There are 30 billion prime numbers below 700 billion. The rest are all subprime.

3. How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday.

4. For Geography students: What's the capital of Iceland? Answer: About Three Pounds Fifty...

5. A trader: "This is worse than a divorce. I've lost half my net worth and I still have a wife."

6. What's the difference between a guy who just lost everything in Vegas and an investment banker? A tie.

7. What's the difference between a bond and a bond trader? A bond matures, trader doesn't.

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6 Replies

(Guest)

Monshi (Job) (34 Points)
Replied 17 October 2008

Investment Ideas!

If you purchased Rs1, 00,000 of Morgan Stanley stock 1 year ago, you would have Rs 4,900 today.

If you purchased Rs1, 00,000 of AIG stock 1 year ago, you would have Rs 3,300 today.

If you purchased Rs1,00,000of Lehman Brothers stock 1 year ago, you would have Rs 0.0 today.

But, if you purchased Rs1,00,000 worth of beer 1 year ago, drank all the beer, returned the aluminum cans for a recycling refund, you would have Rs21,400!!!

Rajesh Reddy I V (Debt Capital Market) (28 Points)
Replied 23 October 2008

A trader: "This is worse than a divorce. I've lost half my net worth and I still have a wife."

President Bush said clients shouldn't be concerned by all these bank closings. If the bank is closed, you just use the ATM, he said.

George Bush said that he is saddened to hear about the demise of Lehman brothers… His thoughts at this time go out to their mother as losing one son is hard but losing two is a tragedy.

Why are all MBAs going back to school? To ask for their money back.

If you want to gamble, go to Las Vegas. If you want to trade in derivatives, God bless you.

Lehmann have changed their recommendation on Lehmann from hold to sell.

Forty years ago I sold fifty shares of my company stock and had enough money to purchase a brand-new 1967 Ford pickup. Last week, I checked it out, and if I sold another fifty shares, I'd have enough money to buy a
1967 Ford pickup. So, the market has stablized.

Anuraag Sharma (Sr Executive Finance) (845 Points)
Replied 29 October 2008

Investments ideas are not so bad today as the market is gonna towards aboom soon in a short span.............long term investment can be a better choice now a days...........:)