Im a failure mother..thanks to icai

i gave my exam at nov13. when my son was 10  months old.. had practical experience.. enough coaching while im being conceived and a strong confidence on the success... as im turning anemic with work, feeding and exams... i compromised my son without feeding him n left him to my mother for care... stayed alone in my room for months together practising for exams n was the best attempt to my knowledge... finally the worst result n there is no meaning for my hardwork, confidence and mainly the suffering is that i compromised my kid's health too.. don't know who can stop my tears n relieve me from pain,,, no idea about the future...