At the very least, your praise should always include these three elements:
§ The name of the person you are praising
§ The specific thing you saw them do, and where and when
§ Sincerity
Their name – you should always address a person by their name because it conveys respect. The sweetest word in most people’s ears is the sound of their own name. And, if you address me by my name, it means you know my name — it means you’ve noticed me. One of the great cravings of the human soul is to be noticed. If you start any sentence with someone’s name, you’re starting off on the right foot.
The specifics – if your praise is vague, it can sound insincere. As you start to praise more, you will frequently encounter people resisting your praise — they will say “it was nothing” or “I was just doing my job.” And maybe, deep down, they don’t think they deserve praise, or perhaps they suspect you are trying to manipulate them. If you are extremely specific, you can bypass that resistance and earn their trust.
Sincerity – you should only ever give praise that you actually mean. Unearned praise is mere flattery. A real man doesn’t manipulate people’s emotions, or use false or empty praise. Think about a time you earned the praise of somebody you respected. You valued that praise because you valued the opinion of the person giving it. And, you valued that praise because you trusted the sincerity of the person giving it.
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