Are there times you just feel like giving up? Do you feel like you're being backed into the wall but there's nowhere to run and no reason to move? If you catch yourself saying, "Why bother?" you may be experiencing hopelessness but you're not alone.
To get started, take a moment to review the litany of thoughts constantly running through your head. Do you think any of the following statements:
- Why bother? Nothing will work out.
- I'll never be happy.
- My relationship can never get better.
- I'll never be able to get what I want.
- There's no use in trying.
- There aren't any good men (women) left.
- I'm too old (ugly, poor, boring, damaged, etc.)
- I can't compete.
- I'm cursed. The world is against me.
As a result of your hopelessness, you don't see your friends, you isolate yourself, you don't exercise, you don't try anything new. And that just adds to your depression and hopelessness. You spiral down in a whirlpool of sadness.
While writing "Beat the Blues Before They Beat You", I realized the single most important issue to address for someone who is depressed is her feeling of hopelessness. If you are absolutely convinced that life is hopeless, then you won't do anything to help yourself. But no matter how hopeless it seems, there are things you can do—right now—that can help you find a way out.
By Robert Leahy, PhD
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