!..did you smile today - take a look..!

Sanket (!..Live to Give..!) (16304 Points)

06 December 2012  
 
 
 
 
 
 *Sugar Test* *
 
Sardar enters kitchen, opens sugar box, looks inside
 and closes it. This he does again and again. Why? Because the doctor told
 him to check sugar level regularly.
 
 
* *Apple in a Mango Tree* *
 
Sardar climbed a tree. Monkey asked: "Too uper
 kyon aaya?" Sardar: "Apple Khane" Monkey: "Yeh to mango tree"
 Sardar: "Idiot, apple saath laaya hoon"
 
 
* * Sardars and scooter* *

 Three Sardars were going on a scooter. Traffic police showed them his
 hand. One of the Sardars told: We are already three, sorry, there is no
 space.
 
 
* * Lion and Sardars* *

 Two Sardars were in a forest, when a lion came roaring towards them. One
of them throws sand into its eyes, and runs. Second one stays unmoved. When
asked why he is not running, another Sardar tells: "Why should I be
 running? It is you who has thrown the sand "
 
* * Cyclone* *

 Bank manager asks Sardar in an intervi ew: "What is cyclone"
 Sardar: "It is the loan given to purchase a cycle"
 
 
* * Side Effects* *

 Once Sardar brought some tablets and started cutting the edges. Do you
 know why? He wanted to avoid side effects!
 
* * Same person* *

 Sardar looked himself in a mirror and said: "Isko kahin dekha hai... Haan!
 Yaad aaya, yeh to wahi kameena hai jo mere shaadi ke album mein mere biwi
 ke saath hai"
 
 
 * *Bus tickets* *

 Bus conductor: Ticket, ticket
 Sardar: Give two tickets
 Conductor: Why two?
 Sardar: If I lose one, another will be there
 Conductor: What if you lose both?
 Sardar: No problem, I have pass...
 
 
 * *Advice* *

 A famous Sardar's declaration to the media: "I will never marry in my
 life. And I will advise the same to my children too"
 
* * Oxygen* *

 Teacher: Oxygen is very essential to life. It was discovered in 1773
 Sardar: Thank God!! I was born after 1773. Had I born earlier, I would
 have died...
 
 
* * Skeleton* *

 Interviewer: What is a skeleton?
 Sardar: Sir, skeleton is a person who started dieting, but forgot to stop
 it!!
 
 
** Starting Salary* *

 MD: I give you driver job. Starting salary is 2000 Rs.
 Sardar: Oh, thank you. What is the driving salary and stopping salary?
 
 
 **New moon day* *

 ISRO sent a Sardar to Moon. Sardar got into rocket, but jumped halfway,
 shouting "How dare you cheat me. Today is new moon day. There will be no
 moon"

 
 
 ** Mirror* *

 Boss: Ek achcha mirror leke ao, jisme m ujhe mera chehra dikhayi de.
 Sardar: Boss, mein sab dukaan gaya , par sab mein mere hi chehra dikha...
 Apka chehra dikhanewala kahin nahi mila.
 
 
 ** Hindi and English* *

 Sardarni to a doctor: Mera beta motorcycle se gir gaya
 Doctor: I can't understand Hindi. Can you tell in English* *
 Sardarni: My londa gironda from Hero Honda
 
 
**Yes/No* *

 Sardar reported for his university final examination, which consists of
 Yes/No type questions. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at
 the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes
 his purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing it, marking the answer
 sheet Yes for Heads and No for Tails.
 Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is
 sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he is seen desperately
 flipping the coin, muttering and sweating.
 The moderator, alarmed, approaches his and asks what is going on.
 Sardar replies, "I'm rechecking my answers and I don't think I did very
 good."
 
 **Microsoft Office* *

 Interviewer: Do you know Microsoft Office?
 Sardar: No, but I can find it if you give address...
 
 
** Compound Sentence* *

 Teacher: Tell a compound sentence.
 Sardar: Stick No Bills!
 
**Colour TV* *

 Sardar bought a new colour TV and put it in water. Why?
 He wanted to check whether colour goes or not!!
 
 
**Calender* *

 A person went to a Sardar's shop.
 Person: I want 2007 calender
 Sardar: Sorry sir, you are too late. We have only 1000 calenders left
 
 
 **Lottery* *

 Sardar bought a lottery ticket for 10 Rs. Luckily Sardar won 10 crores for
 that. He went to the shop to collect the prize money. The owner cut the tax
 and gave him 7 crores.
 Sardar: Give me full 10 crores or give my 10 Rs. back
 
 **Imagination* *

 Sardar went to an interview.
 Interviewer: Imagine that you are in the fifteenth floor. Suddenly fire
 bursts out, and there are many people who are struggling to survive.. In
 that situation, what do you do ?
 Sardar: Oye! I will stop imagining
 
 
**ATM PIN* *

 Sardar was drawing money from ATM.
 A person, who was just behind him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've
 seen ur password. Its 4 asterisks (****).
 Sardar replies, "Ha! Ha! Ha! You are wrong. Its 1258."
 
 
 ** Sun v/s Moon* *

 Sardar's theory: The moon is more important than the sun, because the moon
 gives light at night when it is needed, but the sun gives light during day
 when it is available abundantly...
 
 
**Delivered* *


 Sardar sent a SMS to his pregnant wife. Two seconds later a report came to
 his phone and he started dancing. Why?
 The report said, "DELIVERED".*