First of all , my best wishes for a bright future ahead.
It's good to hear that you want to pursue teaching and share knowledge. Money and everything is fine but you have to be driven by passion to teach because it's a very noble thing where in a student completely trusts you. May be after years of studying, you have accumulated vast amount of knowledge and feel you can easily impart the knowledge. But studying yourself and imparting knowledge is a different ball game all together. So I hope you are adequately equipped to tackle the challenge.
I feel sad to hear about your mental illness and trauma but at the same time I feel equally proud to see you fighting for yourself. At the end of the day, it's your race and you have to slog it out. I can understand it's a long way ahead and life keeps on throwing challenges but then we must fight it out.
Few things which I would suggest you to do -
- Start Meditation and keep yourself Positive. past you cannot change , so there's no point crying over what has happened. Focus on present and how to make yourself better.
- Stop degrading your work. Like you mentioned "Just a copy paste job". Please refrain from degrading your work. Even if it may seem non value add to you, remember , your house bills are taken care of from the salary you get. Take pride in what ever small work you do. Your Life is not a job profile but a journey and the true purpose is to find happiness in what ever you do - big or small is immaterial.
- Journey of thousand miles begin with a single step. Break your life into chunks of 5 years. what you want to achieve in the longer term depends on how you do in small steps. Patience, discipline and perseverance are the three pillars to focus on.
- Start writing to flush out all the negativity. Be your own best friend and stop listening to sentimental /sad songs. How you feel should not be affected by external forces.
- Read daily. Implement what you read. Set yourself a target of must do things daily , like reading,exercising,meditating.
- Save and invest. Take control of your finances.Start financial planning and keep a tab on your spending.Refrain from spending things which you "want" but rather spend on things you need.
- Make it a point to help others and the blessings will come back to you. Remember ,there's someone whose life is even more struggling than yours and your helping hand can make it better.
- Multitasking you mentioned, is not a big deal.We all do. We all have to wear many hats and we all do multiple things all the time. Don't let your brain take that as an excuse.
- Talk to people more. Networking is the key. There are 1000s of opportunities in this world but you have to be up and ready to grab it when the opportunity presents itself to you. Nothing comes in a plate, you have to slog it out.
I pray for your success . What ever you do, give your best. Smile more often and hope you become the best version of yourself each day.