MALE VS FEMALE

793 views 8 replies

[DISCLAIMER : I KNOW ITS A PROFESSIONAL SITE, SO KEEPING IN MIND THE SAME, SHARING SOMETHING THAT IS NOT PROFESSIONAL. NOTHING PERSONAL, NO OFFENCES, PLEASE. THANK YOU]

 

 

 

MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE  


 
 
 

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

 
 
   
 

'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

 
 
 

Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

 
 
 

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed.. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender.
'

 
 
 



 
 
 

************ ********* ********* *

 
 
 

MALE PROCEDURE:

   
 

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

 
 
 

2. Put down your car window.
 
 


 

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

 
 
 

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

 
 
 

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

 
 
 

6. Put window up.

 
 
 

7. Drive off.

 
 
 



 
 
 



 
 
 

************ ********* *****

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

 
 
 

Unfortunately, most of this part is the Truth!!!

 
 
 

1. Drive up to cash machine.

 
 
 

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

 
 
 

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

 
 
 

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

 
 
 

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

 
 
 

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

 
 
 

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

 
 

8. Insert card.

 
 
 

9. Re-insert card the right way.

 
 
 

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

 
 
 

11. Enter PIN.

 
 
 

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

 
 
 

13. Enter amount of cash required.

 
 
 

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

 
 
 

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

 
 
 

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

 
 
 

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

 
 
 

18. Re-check makeup.

 
 
 

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

 
 
 

20. Reverse back to cash machine.
!
 
 
 

21. Retrieve card.

 
 
 

22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!

 
 
 

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

 
 
 

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

 
 
 

25. Redial person on cell phone.

 
 
 

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

 
 
 

27. Release Parking Brake.

Replies (8)

Really funny.................u r safe by giving disclaimer

Yeah i had to, coz few may take it in a wrong way

nice

Thanx rajesh bhai





good one

Disclaimer is nice..........Dhiraj bhai.....good one.........

nyc 1 bro !! 

Leave a Reply

Your are not logged in . Please login to post replies

Click here to Login / Register  

Company
Featured 24 June 2026
HEAD - AUDIT AND TAXATION

A R JADHAV AND ASSOCIATES

Mumbai

CA Inter

View Details
Company
ARTICLESHIP 04 June 2026
Article

Rakhecha & Co.

New Delhi

CA Inter

View Details
Company
ARTICLESHIP 27 June 2026
CA Articled Trainee And Paid Assistant

SKAA & Associates

New Delhi

CA Inter

View Details
Company
ARTICLESHIP 20 June 2026
Articleship

RB KESHRI & CO

Mumbai

B.Com

View Details
Company
22 June 2026
Accountant

Global Image Technologies Private Limited

New Delhi

MBA

View Details
Company
ARTICLESHIP 24 June 2026
CA Article Trainee

Rahul Dang & Associates

Pune

CA Inter

View Details
Company
25 June 2026
AUDIT MANAGER

JDAS & ASSOCIATES

New Delhi

CA

View Details
Company
20 June 2026
Assistant Accounts Manager

Fintax Professionals

Gurgaon

CA Inter

View Details