Life in India after few years.....Once Indian National ID card in place
A citizen of India calling Pizza Hut
Operator: ' Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your name please
Customer: 'Mukesh Bhandari, can I order..'
Operator: 'Can I have your Indian identity card number please, Sir?'
Customer: ' It's eh..., hold........ ..on..... .889861356102049 998-45-54610'
Operator: 'OK... you're... Mr Mukesh Bhandari from Delhi and you're calling fromFlat #402, DLF Building, South Delhi. Your home number is 011-23661231, 011-23661232, your office number is 011-28852302, 011-28852303 & your mobilenumbers are 9916656667, 7116656667. Where has the delivery to take place Sir?'
Customer: ' Home... !!! How did you get all my phone numbers?
Operator: ' We are connected to the Indian National Security System Sir'
Customer: 'May I order your Non veg Pizza...'
Operator : 'That's not a good idea Sir'
Customer: 'How come?'
Operator :'According to our medical records - you went for your check up lastweek to AIMS Hospital & you have high blood pressure and even
higher cholesterol level Sir'
Customer: 'What? ... What do you recommend then?'
Operator :'Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it'
Customer: 'How do you know for sure?'
Operator :'You borrowed a book entitled 'Popular Hokkien Dishes' from the
National Library in Chandni Chowk, last week Sir'
Customer: 'OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then, how much will that cost?'
Operator :'That should be enough for your family, Sir. The total is3,960.00'
Customer: 'Can I pay by credit card?'
Operator: 'I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your First ICICI credit card is over the limit and you owe Citibank Credit card another 93,720.00 since October. That's not including the late payment charges on your housing loan to HDFC, Sir.'
Customer: 'I guess I have to run to the neighborhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives'
Operator:'You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've reached your daily limit on HSBC ATM withdrawal for today'
Customer: 'Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?'
Operator: 'About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always come and collect it on your Honda Civic...'
Customer: 'What!'
Operator :'According to the details in the system , your Honda Civic car Insurance,Registration in the name of Mallika Bandari is expiring in 23 days & your Hyundai Sonata has already got expired last month.....
Customer:'?? ??'
Operator: 'Is there anything else Sir?'
Customer: 'Nothing... by the way... aren't you giving me those 3 free bottles of cola as advertised?'
Operator: 'We normally would Sir, but based on your records you're also
diabetic.... ... '
Customer:#$$ ^%&$ @ $% ^ tm kiere.....abe ytga...npiye! !!!!!!...... ....... .
Operator :'Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 2009 on Delhi Harsha Road, when you wrongly overtook the BMW & you were convicted of using abusive language also on the policeman... ?'
Customer (fainted)
Operator: hello hello, are you still there....
CAclubindia
