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Discussion > Others > Humour >

Some Whacky Definitions !!!

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Company Secretary and Compliance Officer

[ Scorecard : 75832]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 10:50 Report Abuse

School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

 

 

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.


Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.


Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

 

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"



Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.


Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.


Father: A banker provided by nature.


Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.


Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.


Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.


Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.


Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.


Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.


Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.


Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.


Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.


Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.


Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.


Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death

 


 



Total thanks : 2 times


Ankur Garg
Company Secretary and Compliance Officer

[ Scorecard : 75832]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 11:16



Total thanks : 1 times



Ankur Garg
Company Secretary and Compliance Officer

[ Scorecard : 75832]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 11:21

IT Heights...


HEIGHT OF ISOLATION:
Two persons sitting side by side using emails to communicate with each other.


HEIGHT OF COWARDICE:
Two persons fighting through emails.


HEIGHT OF HELPLESSNESS:

 

Receiving no emails for a week.


HEIGHT OF FRUSTRATION:
The email server being down.


HEIGHT OF CARELESSNESS:
Writing a love mail and doing a 'Send All.'


HEIGHT OF TIMEPASS:
A person sending email to himself


HEIGHT OF EXPECTATION:
Sending Indian cricket team an e-mail, wishing them to win a match


HEIGHT OF REPETITION:
Forwarding an email to someone and receiving the same email forwarded back to you By some one in the receiving chain.


HEIGHT OF BROWSING:
U r swimming in the water tank and shout 'F1 F1 F1 ' instead of shouting 'HELP' when u are unable to swim...



Total thanks : 3 times


Tejun
Student

[ Scorecard : 295]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 12:19

Really fantastic sir.....

I really cant think such kind of humours..

Heads off......

Really Thanks



Total thanks : 1 times


Ankur Garg
Company Secretary and Compliance Officer

[ Scorecard : 75832]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 12:22

Thanks Tejun for noticing the post !!!



Total thanks : 1 times


CA Himanshu Khandelwal
CA

[ Scorecard : 321]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 12:42

Gud1 sir.....

Nice.....



Total thanks : 1 times


Manikanta Raju CA,CWA,(CS)
Industry

[ Scorecard : 4449]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 16:34

One more beautiful delivery from ankur ji...

Thanks for the post.!!



Total thanks : 1 times


Aditya Maheshwari
CA in Practice

[ Scorecard : 33951]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 18:00



Total thanks : 1 times


geetha
CWA Inter student

[ Scorecard : 156]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 18:14

Really very nice sir.



Total thanks : 1 times


Ankur Garg
Company Secretary and Compliance Officer

[ Scorecard : 75832]
Posted On 21 September 2010 at 18:34

Thanks members for comments


Sorry guys for repeating the post as i was not aware about the existence of this post. Ya others forum ka chakkar hi bakar hai...


Thanks Aditya Ji for the link.



Total thanks : 1 times

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